Pakistani men are typically insecure by nature. Seeing your sister or wife heck, even mother, going out all by themselves fills you with all sort of apprehensions while standing by them while they try and figure their lives out on their own is an alien concept. Similarly, completely natural things like periods gross you out and talking about it apparently makes you uncomfortable but it is totally okay for you to see a woman being harrassed publicly because mard hain, ignore kardo.
Here are just a few of the things that SHOULD actually make Pakistani men uncomfortable, instead of the totally normal things like pregnancy problems and periods:
1. Men sitting around, tarrofying every mohallay ki larki while you laugh at every joke about those women’s bodies
2. Seeing your wife/girlfriend not sharing her problems because of fear that your parents will not approve of her opinions
3. You not being able to tell even your male friends if you are sick or there’s something wrong with your body because you fear being called unmanly, as a result
4. Your friend who shares his emotional distress being bullied because ‘larkiyon jaisi baatein kar raha hai‘
“Larki na ban yaar. Yeh rona dhona band kar”.
5. Not supporting your wife because you fear being labelled as a joru ka ghulam
6.You not being able to help your wife during periods or pregnancy because you never bothered to understand basic biological processes.
7. Men in your family casually threatening to kill their daughter because she wants to marry outside of their caste or to a man she likes
Or maybe wants to pursue a profession that is uff so haram.
8. You not having the courtesy to pleasure your wife during sex because you are too self absorbed
9. Seeing your cousin/brother/uncle secretly pinching their wives in family gatherings if they try to be vocal about something, and not saying anything about it.
“Sssh, tum chup karo. Ham bahir rehte hain hamain pata hai zamana kesa hai.”
10. Seeing your friends call a male friend “gay”, “hijra” or “khusra” just because he is vocal about his feelings.
11. And not being able to tell your wife how you truly feel about her or sharing your fears about life because you feared losing your control over her.
12. Children in Kasur, or Pir Wadhai being raped, kidnapped and killed and every other horrible thing imaginable being done to them by men who look just like you.
13. Finally, someone casually threatening another person by calling out for their murder in the comments section just because, and you not stopping them until they came for you too.
Cover image via: Bol Platoon