The news of the second marriage of journalist Iqrar ul Hassan caused a frenzy on social media yesterday. Like the gossip-starved audience that we are, people just couldn’t stop speculating about the circumstances, timing and details of the second marriage of the popular TV anchor.
The news came to light after his followers questioned him about a few of Iqrar ul Hassan’s pictures, in which he clearly pointed out that it was his second wife
Hiding ?? You must be kidding. Here’s the answer. My both wives and my son 🙂 pic.twitter.com/ulSn0LYGjT
— Iqrar ul Hassan Syed (@iqrarulhassan) April 10, 2018
Despite it being a very private matter, Iqra ul Hassan did not hesitate in answering any questions about it
One of the biggest concerns which came forth in the comments was people’s shock at the fact that two women are getting along with each other
In fact, even Iqrar mentions it in one of his videos that people cannot believe that his wives get along. This is a concept alien to them and they think that women are always against each other.
Just because mainstream media and pop culture reinforces the fact that women cannot get along and are always in a fight against each other, does not mean it is true
And this is certainly not the reason why polygamy is not accepted in this society. The reason why culturally polygamy is looked down upon is because of the culture of the subcontinent, where polygamy was not accepted. Women are not to blame here.
This might come as a surprise to you, but women do get along with each other. This is not just limited to marriage but in general circumstances even. While yes, some may be influenced by media’s portrayal of women but that in no way means that the reality
This shock was not just limited to men in the society but women as well. They also believe that it is impossible for any woman to accept that her husband wants to marry someone else as well.
Here are some comments showing the disbelief of people that is deeply ingrained among the general public because polygamy is a cultural taboo
Polygamy in the cultural context of Pakistan, like majority of the Western cultures, is viewed as a taboo
Despite the religion adhered to by the majority allows the practice, culturally second marriage is looked down upon. It stems from the idea that a man should remain faithful to one woman because she is doing the same for him in return. People who do use this option are looked down upon and are thought of as those who have betrayed their wives.
I was shocked when I read this message
Bhai way you can do this ???????????????
— Maryam Malik (@maryam_wb_iuh) April 10, 2018
Kuttay ko kheer hazam nae hoti….
— Naheeda (@Hussain1Naheeda) April 13, 2018
Bhai jan Ek shaadi k bd Ishqbaazi NHi krni chaye apko ek Achi family thi to dosri ki kya Zarorat Pragaye the . Dosron p ungli uthaane wale jb log tm se pochte he to Gusa hojate ho shame on u mr. Plz kuch Sharm kro koi pochta he to wazat krte ho again shame on u
— N. Solanki (@solanki81) April 13, 2018
People are also bringing up religion in this case
According to people, second marriage should be done with someone who is in need. This means a divorcee, or a widow.
They also think that people tend to use religion for their own sake wherever applicable.
Iqrar ul Hassan has already clarified that his second marriage was not just because the religion allows it. It was something that happened and happened with the consent of his first wife. Hence bringing religion into this debate is not useful.
Many also think that this marriage is an example of a man’s lust
They are pointing out the same thought that if a woman is ready to spend her entire life with one man, why can’t the man reciprocate that?
However, again, this is a matter of personal choice and his first wife is alright with his decision.
Here are a few things that should be learned from this entire fiasco over Iqrar’s marriage
- Polygamy is a personal choice. Some are ok with it and some are not. This does not mean that either of the two are wrong or right. If it works for a couple, good for them. If it does not work for a couple, good for them too.
- Women are not always against other women. They get along together and do not try to bring each other down. Iqrar ul Hassan’s marriage is a proof of it. Yes, you may know other examples but that only goes to show that there are several realities existing in the world.
- Religion is a personal choice. Let’s not debate about it.
- This is definitely not a matter of lust, at least we cannot label it as such. Anyone who opts for a second marriage, and the people involved are ok with it, should not be a cause of concern for the rest of the world.