It’s been a strange couple of months as far as white people trying to “save” Pakistan has been concerned. We’ve all survived Jeremy and we’re collectively struggling with the concept of Cynthia, as of late. It’s been…quite a ride. Many phaddas later, the Twitterverse stumbled upon a new name: Samantha Gerry.
Samantha A. Gerry’s journey began as an enigma.
Naam sun ke hee lag raha tha ke savior complex koot koot ke bhara hoga.
Samantha begum quickly had Pakistani Twitter spinning endlessly into a pit of utter frenzy. “U.S couchsurfer” alone set countless hearts aflutter, as many began to picture this naïve model/vlogger making her way into Pakistan by asking Twitter for help. Of course, the fact that the account was made in Jan 2019 (like, basically this month) was suspicious. But caution was thrown to the wind by many.
Samantha’s Twitter account soon started to get some attention…
When I told my parents I am visiting Pakistan, they asked if I was going to join Al-Qaeda. OMG the ignorance in America!
How do I convince my friends/family Pakistan is a lovely friendly place? 🙁
— Samantha A. Gerry (@SamanthaAGerry1) January 21, 2019
…especially when she dragged in some manjay huay khiladi
OH MY GOD! I Just joined Twitter and mention Pakistan and there are so many people spreading all kinds of rumours about me. I see what @CynthiaDRitchie meant about 5th generation warfare
— Samantha A. Gerry (@SamanthaAGerry1) January 21, 2019
Will be in #Pakistan – June 2019 – looking for recommendations/things to do from fellow vloggers/couch surfers?
Inspired by @CynthiaDRitchie – following you into the unknown girl!
— Samantha A. Gerry (@SamanthaAGerry1) January 21, 2019
Now, as is the case with such accounts and, well, such news in general, a lot of our bholi awaam started to fall for Samantha’s antics. I don’t blame them. With the same annoying persistence and tone of superiority as those before her, it wasn’t that hard to let yourself believe that Samantha was real and yeh bandi Pakistan ki achi image dikha ke hee chain legi.
Some people believed that Samantha’s arrival was imminent.
Anxiously awaiting you in Peshawar, Samantha Asmatullah Gerry, and you know what? There’s a couch you can crash on, for as long as you want. pic.twitter.com/oojZoP8O41
— Ahmad Shahan (@HeelGimmick) January 22, 2019
‘Come to Pakistan, we iz wait for you, you are best, you are rockx, Pakistan safe, you not listen to labarals, you come, you best, you having noor on face MashAllah’
Samantha Asmatullah Gerry’s disciples
— Ahmad Shahan (@HeelGimmick) January 22, 2019
Why is Samantha Gerry following me on Twitter? Am I being watched? Just FYI, I’m a total conformist chicken. Pakistan Zindabad forever, and ever!
— Madiha R (@ahidamzair) January 22, 2019
In fact, most people believed in her existence as a whole. Invitations were sent out.
Are you in the mood of climbing a peak or maybe see the mighty K2 from Concordia? 😍🇵🇰
— Sa'ad Mohamed سعد محمد بن ظفر (@DesiMountaineer) January 21, 2019
This is not gawader but one of my fav places to fish n an excellent coral reef for divers
Charna Island 1 hour drive from Karachi pic.twitter.com/H7gVOi47sC
— Ashar Adil Baloch (@asharadil1) January 22, 2019
Cant wait to come to Islamabad and party with @shehryar_taseer
People in America think that Pakistan is just bombs but it is also jagger bombs!
There is terrorism in every country. Pakistan is resilient,despite all the poverty, terrorism and violence, people still party. Yaay pic.twitter.com/3sJCJPvMUH
— Samantha A. Gerry (@SamanthaAGerry1) January 25, 2019
Lunches were set up
I’d love to take the two of you for lunch and sort this out.
— Shahbaz Taseer (@ShahbazTaseer) January 22, 2019
Samantha was welcomed by many
Welcome to Pakistan, @CynthiaDRitchie can definitely guide you the best, visit Northern Areas of Pak, like Swat, Hunza, Kaghan/Naran, Chitral, Gilgit & Skardu, and if you’re really adventurous than go for Concordia K2 Basecamp. 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
— Rashid Ahmed (@rxahmed) January 22, 2019
Even Obae – uh, I mean, Obi – weighed in…
'Lo macha gali mai shor…
Padosan pakri gayee'— Osman Khalid Butt (@aClockworkObi) January 21, 2019
…multiple times…
You are a radical right wing extremist by your own admission, and a 'Landi Kotal' (which Google translate tells me is a real dirty word), Shahbaz! I am reporting you for cyber-trolling & sense of humor – Twitter will see truth in my pearly whites.#MPGA!
— Osman Khalid Butt (@aClockworkObi) January 23, 2019
…and tried to troll the account as well.
Hello Pakistan, I am your white savior Seymour Butz, will be visiting your country soon to take on The White Man's Burden – what am I hearing about most of you lot hating your country, that's proper naughty.
Say no to the hate, let's all ride unicycles in Darra Adam Khel! pic.twitter.com/UiKdRGJZTJ— Osman Khalid Butt (@aClockworkObi) January 22, 2019
SEYMOUR BUTZ. BRB, WHEEZING.
However, some people started seeing through this random stranger who popped out of nowhere and took Pakistani Twitter by storm.
>Be random muthal teen in central punjab
>thinking about ways to fuck with people
>see all the paindus marrying eastern european chics
>make a fake account for shits and giggles
>girl_stockphoto.jpeg
>say you're a white girl visiting pakistan
>name yourself Samantha Gerry— Mangogh (@ManhattanMango) January 23, 2019
Including Cynthia, btw. She toh seedha blocked Samantha
Unfortunately, this 'Samantha Gerry' has gone from quasi-parody account to condoning rape culture; additionally copy and pasting my published op-eds and using the work as if they are their original thoughts – impersonating me. I've blocked and reported this account.
— Cynthia D. Ritchie (@CynthiaDRitchie) January 24, 2019
Smh. When heroes fall.
Obi also began thinking ke yeh toh pakka koi launda hoga
Hmm. A recent scroll on her timeline sees she's swiftly taken a turn for raunch/obvious parody (see: 'Sheikh Rasheed is good for two nights only') so I'll be surprised if this doesn't turn out to be some Jibran running a parody account.
Wish the satire were sharper.— Osman Khalid Butt (@aClockworkObi) January 26, 2019
In fact, convincing proof was shared that Samantha was, in fact, a mere figment of some nikammay preteen’s imagination, breathed to life via the prowess of social media.
Hey @SamanthaAGerry1 the website where you got/also shared the picture of your family from seems to identify you as Catilyn?
(h/t @Eustacebaaaang for noticing the stock image nature of this) pic.twitter.com/4FmAZCnyWo
— Ahmer Naqvi (@karachikhatmal) January 21, 2019
Apparently, Samantha was already famous under various different names. None of those were actually Samantha.
Guys, this is most probably a fake account. The profile picture is a stock image taken from here: https://t.co/7Yvl9Z4Dix https://t.co/gbtPD2KR9g
— Umer Ali (@IamUmer1) January 21, 2019
Of course, “Samantha” shot back.
How can you call yourself a journalist and not do your basic research?
I am a couch surfer and our pictures are up on https://t.co/sD9UfMEKlS – you can go and verify it!!!!!! https://t.co/Gi2emuLn8j
— Samantha A. Gerry (@SamanthaAGerry1) January 21, 2019
You should be ashamed of yourself sir! I did not realize wanting to go to Pakistan will lead to so much cyber trolling – my profile says I am a couch surfer and our pictures are up on the website. What are you even trying to prove?
This is so sad https://t.co/UMjI2nBFP9
— Samantha A. Gerry (@SamanthaAGerry1) January 21, 2019
Now, Samantha’s account is FILLED with hilarious trolling and it would probably take a whole other piece to dissect each and everything that was talked about. It’s just all very loaded. But while this was going on with “Samantha,” Pakistani comedian Shehzad Ghias was laying low, trolling Samantha endlessly.
Ye @SamanthaAGerry1 aur @CynthiaDRitchie ka kya scene hay?
Split personality ? https://t.co/3e48KbpM6C
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 25, 2019
Then, 15 hours ago (at least it was 15 hours ago when I was writing this,) he invited Sammy to join him for a live chat
Hey @SamanthaAGerry1 – stand up comedian here. If you're not real, let's do a live chat on my instagram?
DM me and let's make it happen
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 25, 2019
He even shared their conversation
So this just happened
And this might be happening tomorrow
Also pretty sure @SamanthaAGerry1 will post this conversation out of context so posting the full one before that happens!@CynthiaDRitchie join us? (Or let's talk in case she doesn't show up) pic.twitter.com/OVlMLR2cST
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 25, 2019
And followed up for confirmations, since Sammy claimed to go live as well.
Just to be sure this is our Skype call right? https://t.co/n175J9juNU
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 26, 2019
Samantha baji nay ek skype id bheji hay
Lag toh fake rahi hay par 7 bajay call zaroor karo ga
Dekhtay hay samantha niklay hi ya shabbir
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 26, 2019
Eventually, it was official.
Interviewing @SamanthaAGerry1 live at 7pm today. Will go live at 645pm. @ZarrarKhuhro @nidkirm @aClockworkObi @karachikhatmal @CynthiaDRitchie @omar_quraishi @Ziyad_F @aimaMK got any questions/want to join live on call/in person? #AskSamantha
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 26, 2019
Now, I’ve REALLY got to give it to Shehzad. That commitment, that dedication, that devotion – it all seemed so real. It seemed like Pakistanis would finally get to see Samantha and ask her ke behen scene kya hai aap ka?
However, to the surprise of some and disappointment of many who had carved Sammy’s name on the walls of their heart, it was revealed that Samantha was Shehzad all along.
(This is how I imagine Shehzad probably feels after pulling this off.)
Honestly, we should have seen this coming from miles away. I mean. Shehzad Ghias. Samantha Gerry. Muft ka ‘A’ beech main daal ke sab ko confuse kardia. Also the fact that she agreed to go live with JUST him? Hmm. Interesting.
Khair, Shehzad promised deets while going live on Instagram.
Samantha A. Gerry's first interview. Watch it live tonight!Is she even real? Is she a white girl from New York or a…
Gepostet von Shehzad Ghias Shaikh am Samstag, 26. Januar 2019
And kept up the jig till the very last minute too…
Going live in 15 minutes…haven't heard from @SamanthaAGerry1 in hours…hopefully she actually turns up!
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 26, 2019
He then eventually went live on multiple platforms, like Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.
— Shehzad Ghias (@Shehzad89) January 26, 2019
Since I was also ridiculously invested, I have the live stream recorded (but I got invested thora ziada hee and now I can’t upload the whole thing.)
Shehzad started by giving background deets about Samantha. He walked people through her Twitter account. Samantha was late, btw. Surprise, surprise. Anyhoo, some technical issues aside, Shehzad kept asking people to ask Samantha questions. And he continued to give deets. Samantha was yet to show up, btw.
Eventually, he powered up Skype to “talk” to Samantha who sounded like a bot. Shehzad acted pretty surprised, eventually revealing that it has been him trolling everyone.
Yep. Shehzad = Samantha.
Now that that’s laid to rest, I suppose we can all feel high-key stupid about falling for this, right? Let us know if you’ve been personally victimized by Samantha A. Gerry.
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