Pakistanis are generally a joy to be associated with, and you all know it! You are adventurous and love having a good time – laughing, cracking jokes, and pulling people’s legs. That is, until someone does or says something that rattles and shakes our entire being, making it absolutely certain about the fact that whilst we are generally very affectionate, we are also short-tempered.
So how can you offend a Pakistani?
1. Call a married man a ‘joru ka ghulam’
This accusation boils his blood and he feels the need to shut the traps of people who call him something he isn’t. Well, he might actually be one but no Pakistani mard‘s ego allows him to be known as a softie.
2. Tell someone they have a ‘kaali zabaan’
This term is used for those who rightly predict the outcome of an unfortunate incident. The psychics, if you will. However, remind them of their unconventional trait, and they would go crazy at the offender.
3. Call people with wrong family names
Pakistanis take pride in their heritage and in their often well-known family names. Call them with a different family name, muddle the pronunciation or simply forget to address them properly, and you can expect a brutal verbal (maybe even physical) bashing from them.
4. Confuse someone’s sect or religion
Source: Asian News
This is the most controversial thing with most Pakistanis. Think of them as someone from a different sect and expect to see fireworks go off. For people whose emotions are fuelled by religion itself, these are grounds that you shouldn’t dare step on!
5. Call someone a jaahil
Driving on the wrong side of the road? Call him a jaahil. Hear someone curse? Call him a jaahil. See someone driving a van with armed guards in the back? Baap ke paas haram ka paisa hai! Also, he’s a jaahil.
These are all the things you can only call a Pakistani if you have a deathwish.
6. Label someone as a ‘Mummy Daddy bacha’
This special ‘praise’ is reserved for the person whose parents don’t allow him to go out with friends, and tells his friends that ‘Ammi Abba nay mana kya hai yaaaar!’ Despite knowing that he, in fact, is a mama’s boy, who needs her permission to do everything, he still gets offended by this seemingly derogatory term.
7. Mistake a Pakistani as Indian
This is an absolute soul destroyer. Indians have been our greatest rivals, in every sense of the word, and for very obvious reasons. Apart from sharing the same average skin color, language, food, traditions, and cultures, we are completely different to Indians!
8. Point out their stereotypical habit
Calling someone with names associated with a cast that is renowned for some particular actions, is actually pretty damn offending. However, that does not stop people from branding a miser or a kanjoos person a ‘memon’, and other things along those lines. You get the hint, don’t you?
9. Give names to people’s physical flaws
Source: Mens XP
Only in Pakistan would you see people call their dark friends “cherry blossom” or their short friend “kodoo“ and have a laugh about it whilst their friend’s face turn red and black with rage!
10. Taunt them for their choice of political parties
How dare you even go there! Call a Noon-Leaguer a Donkey-meat lover, call a PTI fan a rotu, label an MQM supporter a ‘RAW ka agent‘, and a PPP supporter a ‘chor‘ and see them draw guns on you.
11. Have an opinion
Seriously, it is everyone’s opinion that your opinion is always wrong. Disagree with someone on something (especially religion)? Prepare for a verbal bashing and serious ‘kafir‘ fatwas.
There aren’t many people in this world who do ‘getting offended’ better than us Pakistanis. We wouldn’t recommend you go about offending someone, but for a good laugh (and possibly a black eye), you can try.