Pyaar se dar nahi lagta sahab commitment se lagta hai
If you had the option of getting married or jumping in a tub full of lizards, would you seriously consider the lizards? Do you run for the hills when the idea of being with the same person starts to become a reality? Do you like to keep moving to whatever is next, whether it is your job, friends or a romantic partner? Do all these things sound like something who you know would do?
There is a chance that if these things apply to someone you’re dating, they might just be a commitment phobe and not exactly an “adventure-loving, spontaneous” person as you might have been thinking, up till now.
1. Those who’re afraid of commitment get bored really fast
Such people are always looking to do something fun and spontaneous and they make impulsive decisions. These people can’t stay with one person for too long. It’s the mystery that attracts them and when they are well-acquainted they just want to move on to the next person. They get bored of the same job and keep changing workplaces now and then, too.
2. They like things to keep things casual, even if they’re dating one person
You might be dating someone exclusively but they feel the need to reiterate that it’s casual and most of the time they are convincing themselves more than you, their significant other.
3. People who’re afraid of commitment hate criticism and working on themselves for others
Relationship and commitments take work and you learn from your mistakes. Someone who’s afraid of commitment doesn’t like being told they did something wrong or that they have to change any of their ways.
4. Their biggest fear is having “feelings” for someone, even if they pretend they don’t care about feelings
Such people tend to hate the idea of ‘feelings’. If someone opens up to them or there is a slight chance of them getting attached they get scared and run for the exit.
5. Anyone who’s afraid of commitment runs at the first sign of trouble
There are always disagreements in any relationship but such people like to take the easy way out and just end things. Sometimes their reason for ending a relationship might be really stupid.
6. They get into relationships for all the wrong reasons
They might have seen their friends getting married and moving on with their lives so they get in a relationship just so they don’t get left behind. Or any similarly superfluous reason.
7. People who’re afraid of commitment hate getting labelled as someone’s boyfriend/girlfriend, or even just a friend
These people can’t be someone’s best friend, boyfriend, girlfriend or significant other… They’d rather just rather use the word acquaintance or simply be friends with everyone in their life without actually getting too close to really open up to even friends.
8. They like to start new projects but never see them through
They enrolled in guitar classes or thought they could do yoga but left after a few weeks. They tell themselves that they don’t need it or that it just got too boring.
9. Discussions about the future make them cringe because that means making commitment to such plans
They barely plan their day let alone the future. They like to keep the future as a blank slate so it’s really hard for them to make any long term promises. They try to sign yearly contracts with their employer just so they can change jobs if something better or more interesting comes along. With people they just make sure no one gets too close to them.
10. Such a person also doesn’t have any long term close friends
If someone asks about their best friend they tend to not have an answer or just say evasive things like “you’re my best friend”. This is because they never really got emotionally close to anyone in their life to develop true, deep relationships. These people just make new friends every year because they want to keep the social circle as casual as possible.
11. Such a person loves their own space… maybe a little too much, even
Such a person loves being alone more than anything. They like the way things are and hate it if someone tries to enter their personal space.
12. They don’t think ‘True Love’ exists
Love? There’s no such thing. These people tend to debunk any theory surrounding love because there is no point in believing in something that doesn’t exist. There are no “love of your life” or soulmates. According to them, people just stumble into marriages because it’s what you are ‘supposed to do’.
13. They get anxiety with any mention of marriage or commitment
Marriage? What? Nooooo! They tend to avoid conversations with their mom when she is in the ‘shaadi mood’ and avoid their friends when they tell them that it’s time to ‘settle down’. Their stomach starts to hurt when the conversation hits the serious commitment road.
14. Such people hate giving up control in any aspect of life
These folks like to have complete control over everything that concerns them and this is also why they hate the idea of having to give up control to a potential significant other.
15. Deep down inside, they know that they’re just avoiding getting hurt
They know that they are just trying to be practical and keep themselves safe from unnecessary emotional turmoil. They don’t want to get invested in something that might not last.
Do you know someone like this?
Cover image: @Celebcentralpk / Twitter