Who can forget Shaykh Azhar Nasser, the most hilarious Muslim Scholar we’ve encountered thus far? A resident of Canada, his Twitter feed is full of important messages for the Muslim community along with some of the best advice I’ve read in a LONG time. Let’s look at some of his best pieces of advice:
1. If you’re desi, there has been a point in your life where you’ve been lectured about your posture… this is how to fix it
Nothing improves your posture while driving like seeing a cop car.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) August 26, 2018
2. His parenting advice is DA BOMB
“Parenting was much easier when I was raising my non-existent kids hypothetically. “
You begin with these amazing plans to mould their minds and expand their horizons but end up just trying to keep them from electrocuting themselves and killing squirrels.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) August 24, 2018
3. Even the experiences he shares have lessons embedded within
Before having children, it’s important to ask yourself the following question:
Am I prepared to watch the same cartoon on repeat for 9 hours everyday?
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) July 22, 2018
4. He gets that sometimes, kids suck!
I once asked this 7 year old kid if he could get me a cup of water during my lecture. He rolled his eyes.
I was tempted to bodyslam him but remembered that I’m a Sheikh and that’s just unacceptable. #JihadAl-Nafs
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) September 9, 2018
5. He even appreciates flight attendants and low key thinks we should too
I appreciate all the work flight attendants put into their safety demonstrations, but let’s be honest, no one pays attention and if anything goes wrong, no one really knows what to do.
The 40 year old dude next to me playing video games is definitely not gonna save any lives.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) September 3, 2018
6. His sarcasm and wit are on point…
How’s that Ramadan diet going?
Yes, I’m being sarcastic.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) June 6, 2018
7. …and he almost convinces you that things aren’t as tough as they seem.
It is reported that the one who fasts the first 20 days of Ramadan will only be required to fast for another 9 to 10 days.
Admit it, you thought was gonna be a real hadith.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) June 6, 2018
8. Shaykh Azhar Nasser has an answer to every problem.
Sheikh, I’m starting to hate my fiancé because he is obviously too busy for me. I text him and he doesn’t text back.
Sister, Islam teaches us to assume the best of people. Maybe he was so excited you texted him that he fainted.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) August 16, 2018
9. Even ones that seem kinda impossible to tackle.
When one door closes, another opens.
Or you can just open the closed door. That’s kinda how doors work. #persistence
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) August 7, 2018
10. Sometimes, he doesn’t have advice because he’s busy destroying people at what they do best.
A few weeks ago, a Desi uncle asked me to discourage youngsters from playing video games.
I was hesitant only because I destroyed his kids at FIFA only hours earlier.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) August 5, 2018
11. Seriously, though. Shaykh’s got the best life hacks.
How to surprise your family with a delicious meal
1. Order food from a restaurant
2. Take the food out of the take-out boxes and place them on plates
3. Allow them to assume you cooked the meal
4. Enjoy the compliments— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) June 25, 2018
12. I mean, sure – some are questionable, but they ARE effective.
The most effective way to wake someone up for Fajr:
Fill up a pillow case with bars of soap and beat them until they wake up.
I know it’s mean but you can’t deny that it’s effective.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) June 22, 2018
13. He understands our everyday struggles…
2 facts about @netflix
1. Basically has every movie except for the ones I want to watch.
2. It has the same movies in every category
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) August 3, 2018
14. …in a way very few people truly can.
My favorite part of Eid is the parking lot at the masjid.
You can tell shaytan has been released from the way people park.
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) June 14, 2018
15. Moreover, he has the Monday blues like the rest of us
The most honest request I’ve ever heard on a Monday morning 👇🏻
“I need something more than coffee but less than cocaine.”#MondayMotivaton
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) July 2, 2018
16. And even during his most profound moments, he’s kinda like the rest of us.
My brain during the day: Baby shark do do do do do do
My brain at night: I wonder why the nearest galaxy is called the andromeda galaxy. Also, why is this universe so vast and what is the reality of time? #cantsleep
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) July 31, 2018
17. Seriously…Thank you for being so relatable, Shaykh Azhar Nasser.
Sheikh, I used to believe that weed is haram but after watching the baby shark do do do song on YouTube with my kid all morning, I’m really not sure anymore.
Brother, I’ve seen it too and I understand your dilemma. Stay strong
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) July 22, 2018
18. You just get us and we love you for it.
Money can’t buy happiness but I think we can all agree that it’s more comfortable to cry in a Bentley than on a bicycle.
Sorry guys, that’s all I have for you today. #WednesdayWisdom
— Shaykh Azhar Nasser (@ShaykhAzhar) July 25, 2018
We’re not even going to deny that Shaykh Azhar Nasser is the coolest, most hilarious Muslim scholar out there. It just goes to show that you can be religious and take things lightly so that people can relate to you better. Do you find him amazing too? Let us know in the comments.
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Cover Image via Facebook/Shaykh Azhar Nasser