Over the weekend, a Twitter user put forth a very daunting question, one that had even more daunting replies. She says that she, herself, recently got rejected for having bad front teeth. Forget the personality and the overall human being, let’s reject a person based on the condition of her teeth. *cue slow clap*
She asked women from all over Pakistan to come forward with all the reasons they were rejected by rishtey waley and the results were alarmingly sad.
The rishta and shaadi culture in Pakistan is not one we’re unfamiliar with.
The plethora of demands from the in-laws for girls is jaw-droppingly long and doesn’t cease to amuse anyone. From the color of your skin to your height, from the length of your hair to even body language, it doesn’t stop at anything.
Body shape, fat nose and not perfect teeth. No regrets https://t.co/DBtvgAVKx6
— Sahrish (@shadesofsunrise) February 26, 2017
While we’re all at fault when it comes to satiating this societal norm, there is a limit till which we can deter from this path and revolt against at, kiunke aakhir kaar shaadi bhi tau kerni hoti hai.
It’s not only unfair to the girl, herself, but also to the parents because at the end of the day, they all have to fulfill these demands in order to ensure their daughter has a happy married life or just a married life.
I was actually accepted by an aunty for her 33 year old son, only because I was 20. YEAH THAT WAS THE ONLY REASON. 🙂 https://t.co/ufqhctysMk
— Wadairi (@tisfatima) February 26, 2017
Our media and television also don’t help, in this case, either, and keep projecting (forcing) the ideal of the perfect bahu on us.
The whole concept of the girl being fully able to flaunt her lawn dupattas all over her susraal and be the perfect specimen of a chai wali
I've also been rejected on the basis of my skin colour and the fact that I fail to turn myself into a pastry by using so much makeup ✌️ https://t.co/nAltAYj6vi
— عبیر نسیم (@abeerii12) February 27, 2017
"thori ziada healthy hai. patli hoti tou aur bhi achi lagti" https://t.co/IvrErSKi1g
— ayesha (@fabubah) February 26, 2017
However, it doesn’t end there. The replies to this tweet that was liked and shared more than 150 times, combined, garnered a lot of attention, and we didn’t like any bit of it.
rejected x times because i was 'moo phat,' rude & confrontational. BC, you've come here inspecting a human like a horse & i'm the rude one? https://t.co/7WFUV5SFar
— Mehar Khursheed (@meharwk) February 27, 2017
There are women who get rejected on the basis of the fact that they’re too educated and of course taiz because of the education
I was rejected because "hamaray Betay ko ziada parhi hoi nai chahye, wo kehta hai parh kr larkyan taiz ho jati hain" https://t.co/DHyQvWulUL
— Huda. (@IGotSherlocked) February 26, 2017
What parents don’t realize is that they need to bear more children in order for their daughters to get good rishtas
In non physical things, too educated, working women, reads too much, is only daughter so must be really laadli, too introverted, etc, etc. https://t.co/VMxn6PcBa5
— Faiza Yousuf (@FaizaYousuf) February 26, 2017
Or get their eyes fixed before ‘presenting’ them
For wearing glasses https://t.co/SDHbbWo7u6
— Bano (@BanoBee) February 27, 2017
Others because they wanted to pursue their careers
Btw 80% of rishta walas didn't even come over when they found out I was a working woman with no intentions of quitting. Yep https://t.co/0SH3MKpQxL
— Bissmah Mehmud (@bissmahmehmud) February 26, 2017
Then there are certain fields that the girls cannot belong to, otherwise, well, rishtoun mein thoraaa masla ho ga
Like media, of course
I was rejected last year for telling them that I love working in media and won't quit. https://t.co/vOVM0GOUer
— Amina (@Aamenaah) February 26, 2017
And engineering, for some reason, too
Was rejected once ke larki engineer hai. Typical gharelo larki jaisi nahi hogi. Lol what? https://t.co/24yxmTCnQ0
— ماہ نم (@AdrenalineYo) February 26, 2017
And also being ‘modern’ is a thing, now
Looks too modern lol https://t.co/MRUG1fMUlX
— Ash (@ash2fly4u) February 27, 2017
The fact that a girl’s personality is not measured by the qualities she has but by how tall she is, is damning in itself.
Because that’s what it is, right? The taller the girl, the more capable she’ll be of leading a successful marriage
Let's see: short heighted, too chubby, has glasses, hijabi, doctor, age zyada hai.. https://t.co/poNAevgcGV
— ? (@Rabyaaaa_) February 26, 2017
Ek tau sub ko doctor bahu chahiye, aur phir jub doctor bantey huey time lug jaye, tau that is also highly unacceptable
Medium height,Not goori chitti,Why interested in job/studying after marriage/Not a model like look.Also,Doctor banty banty age zada ho gae? https://t.co/v54Bp7ihec
— Rabia (@ad_ra_na) February 26, 2017
While this stands true in a lot of cases
Unfortunately it's always the Ghar walas that do the rejection not the guys themselves. Only one reason for me though. Overweight. https://t.co/G7BgdZ2t9r
— Huda (@enigmaniac1) February 26, 2017
I still fail to see how weight, or height, or teeth, or even the color of your skin has anything to do with how happy your life with your partner will be.
What do you think? Let us know in the comments.