Of course, you’re here because your bladder is just…super damn small. You have to go to the bathroom ten times just because of that morning coffee. But, damn, that morning coffee is so darn good.
Aik taraf you try to keep yourself hydrated because of all “how water is good for your system and shiz” talk aur dusri taraf, aapka apna hee kaam kharab hojata hay. This one’s for those warriors that suffer in silence because of their harami small bladder:
1. You just have to go to the bathroom like, all the damn time.
2. Any and all liquid consumption perpetually horrifies you cuz all you can think about is the rounds of the loo you’d have to take
“Aap chai ya coffee leingi?”
“Nai, bohot bohot shukriya”
3. Sometimes, it’s literally just the SOUND of water and you’re like…haan, ab tou jana hee pareyga
4. You hate, hate, hate, HATE the stupid question, “ghar nikalnay se pehle nai gaye thay?”
5. About to watch a movie at home? Pee break.
Everybody at home basically hates you for asking to hit that pause button so you’re used to missing big chunks of the movie.
6. Going out for groceries? Pee break.
7. Hanging out with friends? Pee break.
8. Going to bed? Bathroom break.
Regardless of this timely ritual, you’re still going to have to wake up in the middle of the night to do your business…AGAIN.
9. Getting up in the morning? The satisfaction of pee.
10. Despite the smallness of your bladder, you’re an expert in holding it in your small little bladder till you absolutely CANNOT.
And the you just can’t help it but LET IT GOOOOOO…
11. All your major life decisions are determined by the proximity of a bathroom.
And not just any bathroom, the loo that is in a good condition.
“Dhaabay ka khana tou bohot aala hay magar bathroom…?”
12. Road trips are an absolute and utter disaster because…you have to make way too many stops.
Remember that Kashmir trip? We don’t talk about that Kashmir trip.
13. Just the idea of wearing a jumpsuit gives you nightmares
(but how will I pee in a hurry when I’m wearing this?)
14. Or the fact that you’d probably have to handle a peeing situation while dressed up like a full-on dulhan (or a sherwani clad dulha).
15. You have bonded with your friends in adjacent bathroom stalls to blur out the sound of pee.
But, hey, you gotta love your body either way. Or do you?
Cover image via: Six Sigma Plus