Call them match-makers, the halaal cupids or simply call them rishtay waali aunties. How they go miles for you, to find you the perfect match that caters to your needs perfectly. Your parents give her a list of all the things they want in your life partner and she sets out on a tiresome journey through cups of chai and tea trolleys ladden with food to find you someone who fulfills that list. Sometimes she even has to make things up, because its your fault, your list was too unrealistic.
Risthtay waali auntie is like your fairy godmother, who takes money and finds you your better half, but she does it so gracefully that you almost forget.
Undoubtedly, these rishtay waali aunties really have united many couples who remain happy throughout their lives. Arranged marriage (actually marriage itself) is a gamble even if it’s done without her, she just presents the options, and leaves the rest on you. She is a facilitator and has helped many in times of need.
So in order to truly respect the rishta aunties, here are all the struggles they go through in their very busy, hardworking lives:
1. She is always on the lookout for a potential rishta
This is a full-time job. It doesn’t matter if she’s at a wedding, a dinner or even a funeral her radar is always ready to detect any human being who has some rishta potential.
2. She has to memorize all the trillion questions she’ll be asking any rishta candidate
Only she has the talent of casually asking questions that someone else will think a twice before asking.
Ye ghar aap ka hai ye karaaye ka?
3. She is a chalta-phirta magnifying glass
To her, larkay waalon ka 1 kanal’s house appears to look like 10 kanals. His one car in the garage doubles and triples and his salary automatically matches Bill Gate’s monthly income.
4. She is good at maths
She rounds off ages to the nearest 10 like a pro.
5. Her eyesight becomes conveniently weak about boys she is representing
She told you the guy is tall, dark and handsome.
And when he comes to visit, he is short, fair and bald.
Beta looks thoray hi matter karti hain.
6. She has some sentences memorized to say to every family she meets
Kia hai na, rishtay toh asmaano pe bantay hain, bus hum koshish hi kar sakte hain. *Dips biscuit in the tea*
7. She sometimes take compliments too far when she wants to please you
Ye apki baiti hai? Mujhe laga Katrina Kaif baithi hai.
MashAllah apka beta tu ditto copy hai Fawad Khan ki.
8. But sometimes, she has to tell you the bitter truth to your face
It’s all about her mood, man.
Apki bari baiti tu bus guzaara hai, choti ka pehle kara doon?
9. She is an X-ray machine
She looks at you and analyzes you from head to toe.
The length of your hair, the measurements of how long your eyelashes are, how tall you are, your complexion, the way you walk, talk and sing. She wants to know it all. You have never felt exposed.
10. She is an accountant
She calculates and manages all kinds of numbers. Ages, heights, bank balances, number of cars, kanals of property, number of rishteydaar and everything else you may want to know.
11. And a dentist
She has to make sure potential bahu ke daant achay hon.
Larki ho ya bakri, sajana toh dono ko hi hota hai.
12. Larkion mein sabse kam age, larkon mein sabse zyada income are her favorite targets
For her these rishtas are jackpots.
13. Finally, poor lady can only see two colors in the world
Either someone is gora or kaala, there is no in between.
What they do is nothing less of an act of kindness, because no matter how they do it, they help people, and for that, we are forever grateful to them.
Cover image via: india.com