This latest Pakistani film by renowned director Syed Noor is so bad, some people are calling it the worst movie ever made. Just when you thought that the industry is at long last progressing and forging its own path, albeit a rocky one with a precarious balance of mainstream and not-so-mainstream films, out Syed Noor pops with his awfully archaic looking Chain Aye Na. The whole thing is so terribly constructed, it makes us wonder if they whole cast and crew were on some sort of psychedelics that led them to make this… disaster.
The trailer opens fine with the actress getting her hair blown by magical winds and some music that one of my colleagues labeled as “porn music”
Then we’re introduced to Adil Murad, who we’re guessing is the antagonist. He asks the girl if he can kiss, ‘Can I kiss?’
We don’t know, can you? At least the redeeming thing is, he sought consent.
And then we find out the ETERNAL LOVE STORY with the hero and heroine shaking hands
We’ve also got a shot of Atiqa Odho and Nadeem showing us it really is an ETERNAL LOVE STORY
But… oh no… pyaar mein dhoka? She’s seen clinking orange juice glasses with another man
ASTAGHZ, Bro
Now that all bets are off, ketchup… I mean, blood, is flying across the screen and sacrifice is being made
Adil is sacrificing his face to some incredible acting and letting it be smeared in ketchup, I mean, blood.
And with this colorful shaadi number we’re reminded it’s a desi film we’re seeing and not Scarface because with the intense scenes earlier one could easily have made that mistake
What’s a Lollywood film without a song and dance number?
Along with ETERNAL LOVE STORY this movie is also about IRREVESIBLE HATE, we are told
?????????????
And of course, the hero is a “true lover” because this is after all an ETERNAL LOVE STORY (just in case you forgot that)
And don’t forget the LOVELY MELODY
Of course, this ETERNAL LOVE STORY has to have a chink in the plan
And the hero has to feel angry
The ghar ke baray have to show him the path to victory
So that he can win the trophy that is the woman in this final victory… or he can die trying…
WHICH ONE IS IT??? ARRRRGHHHH…. I CAN’T WAIT! THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME.
Here’s the intense trailer just for your eyes
All with a shot of the luscious locks of Adil Murad’s chest.
The famed director, Syed Noor, who directs this magnum opus, shot to stardom after his hit 1998 film Choorian, starring his now-wife Saima, Moammar Rana and Nargis. He’s got over forty films under his belt. Considering he has such a plethora of movies one can’t help but ask him, Noor sahab, please share what you’re smoking?
What do you guys think of this trailer? Will you go watch the movie?
Cover photo via Element Media