You’ve been in my life, since we were kids, forced into my life (and mouth) as long as I can remember. You never belonged but you somehow always made your way. Yeah okay, my parents loved you.
The doctor said you were good for my health but you know what? You weren’t good for my heart.
I mean you were, but okay whatever you get my point.
There was a time when I sort of liked you, I was in college, trying new things. You were different, so green, you didn’t come in a box from some Chinese restaurant and you weren’t drenched in oil. It was exciting, finding something new to eat. Soon that likeness turned into love. I started to adore you, obsess even! Lettuce, iceberg, romaine – it didn’t matter what color or consistency you were, you were perfect in every way.
Except kale, kale was nasty.
Soon enough, I realized woh sacha pyaar nai tha, woh fake news tha. My friends were all so much happier than me. Well, heavier too but whatever they were happy. Sure- they couldn’t walk too fast without getting tired, it would take some time to make our way upstairs but the way they looked at their pizza and burgers, I forgot what that connection felt like. I convinced myself you were what I wanted in life, the kind of life I wanted to lead…and eat…
I’m only human okay?! I have weaknesses and I have strengths – you, were my downfall.
I had to breakaway from you, from my fake, sad, salad filled life. I needed more color, more oil, more calories.
Basically everything I used to eat before my doctor gave me a health warning.
Of course, not all of our memories were bad. You did make me happy, you did add more value to my life and you did make me healthy. Like, really healthy. Like wow abs for days.
But I’m young, I’m learning, I have my whole life to be healthy, I have to do me. I need to be unhealthy.
I need to be me.
So here’s to you salad, thank you for showing me what life is like without breathing issues and thanks for letting me know that it is not the life for me.
Love you salad, but I have to go. They just brought my burger.
Do you have strong feelings toward your food? Don’t worry, we are all friends here, let them out in the comments section.