Admit it, you were excited when someone said life begins at 30. But now that you’ve hit the 30 mark, you’re thinking uhhh… where is the excitement everyone was talking about? I feel the same, look a little older and well, I have a new wrinkle here and there to make me feel like I need to buy that anti-aging serum already. Khair, for all those Pakistanis nearing 30, here’s how it feels when you hit the mark.
1. You make the transition from being called bhai/baji to uncle/auntie
It’s cringe-worthy. I’m not an uncle/aunty. I’m me – 30-year-old me. Kya masla hai yaar?
2. You spot your first gray hair
It starts off with one random gray strand, and before you know it, your whole head has bunches of gray here and there. Nooo… but abhi toh main jawan hun.
. Wazan kam nai hota
You could eat whatever you wanted in your early 20’s, but as soon as you reach your late 20’s, you start getting flab in places you never knew flab could even exist. That plate of Nihari won’t help your situation either.
4. Wrinkles – they exist
Those morning smiles in the mirror don’t seem so attractive anymore as you spot the earliest signs of wrinkles. Heck, you don’t even want to smile your widest smile anymore. Because laugh lines.
5. You could spend the whole evening alone and still not be bored
Heck, you could just sit in the same position for several hours and be perfectly happy and contented with yourself. Who needs people anyway?
6. Party scene on hai, but sakoon bhi chahiye yaar
You’ve probably hit the 30 mark when you go to a party or even a mehndi and start getting awazar by the loud music, overly excited people and the crazy disco lights. Your idea of fun includes a quiet evening with your chuddy buddies.
7. As 10:00 p.m. approaches, your mind starts yelling “bistarrrrr”
Especially on a weekday when you know that you have piles and piles of work tomorrow and your boss is super unreasonable.
8. Hangouts with your friends become less often but more meaningful
You’ve hit the big 30 when you have a close group of friends who know you inside out. They’re your people. Y’all don’t need to see each other every day to validate your bond…maybe once every 6 months…FaceTime bhi chalta hai.
9. You’ve developed your own style and DGAF about the rapidly changing trends
If ya like that chappal with a flower on it, you will wear it to work, at home, to your mom’s, even in the toilet. You don’t give two hoots about the latest trends if your comfort is being compromised.
10. Ammi sahi kehti theen yaaaaar
At 30, you realize that your mom was right when she said that one chamcha of Ispaghol will cure all your problems. Or that patience is a great virtue. Orrr that paisay darakhton pe nai ugtay (That one hit the hardest.)
11. You like talking to your behn/bhai
The behn/bhai you hated the most? Yeah, they’re now your confidant, your pal and basically, your blood-related bestie.
12. You feel slightly embarrassed publicly listening to weird songs
What? They have catchy tunes acha?
13. You don’t feel bad about cutting out toxic people from your life
You have zero tolerance for drama and mind games. If someone’s not your cuppa tea, you distance yourself from them.
14. You no longer feel the need to be accepted – jaisa hu, acha hun!
You start accepting your strengths and weaknesses and make the most of them. If phupho doesn’t like you… koi baat nai yaar.…khala kay ghar chalte hain, she always makes you feel welcome.
15. You’re able to handle heartbreak like a champ
Didn’t marry your childhood sweetheart? Koi nai yaar…as long as he/she’s happy. Mangni tooti? Haan uskay baal achay they…but yeh nahi toh koi aur sahi.
16. You learn to keep apnay kaam se kaam
You saw Chintoo ki Ami ki behn ke husband ki doosri biwi ke bachay drinking alcohol and making out with a guy? Sanu ki yaar! Lagay raho!
17. You start saving money for the future (or at least thinking about it)
You start saving or investing money with the thought of making your own house one day, or saving for your kid’s education, or to maintain a nice living standard. Gone are the days of impulsive buying and splurging on gold sneakers and pink phones.
18. You can’t have a decent conversation before your two cups of chai or coffee
Over the years, either chai or coffee has become a part of your mandatory morning ritual. You can’t function without it.
19. You start noticing your eyesight becoming weaker
All those hours spent in front of the office laptop since your post-grad, actually start showing their effects now – Your eyesight starts becoming weaker. This is especially true for women after giving birth.
20. Abba se ab darr nai lagta
The same Abba jin ke chittar se dar lagta tha, is now your friend. You’re now able to discuss anything and everything with him because, c’mon, Abba always makes you feel better.
21. You are your parents’ official advisor
You’re now the official referee in your parents’ cute fights. But more importantly, they now seek your advice in important decisions and look up to your opinion.
22. Stability is key
Respect, love, space, and consistency in relationships form your idea of a perfect companionship. If you have these, you feel at peace with your personal life.
23. Reconnecting is important
You’ll scroll down your Facebook newsfeed and actually muster up the courage to reconnect with people you haven’t spoken to in years. Just to check up on them or say hi or even make plans to meet up (Which might never happen btw)
24. Time flies by
Oh bhains…abhi toh January tha…yeh April ka mid kab aya? Time flies by REALLY quickly.
25. You start checking out younger people
Razor cut hairstyles and guitars are not on your priority list anymore but you can’t help but looking at the young energy with envy.
26. You start wishing you had more fun in your 20’s
You regret every moment of your 20’s which you spent stressing over university work, your shitty first relationship and fake AF friends. You wish you were as badass then as you are now.
27. People in their 20’s will refer to you as old
You have in internal moment of utter shock when you realize that kids born in the year 2000 are 18 years old now, especially when they tell you that you don’t know anything and that you’re not cool. What the hell? I INVENTED COOL BETCHES.
28. Hello dark circles
Every morning you look in the mirror and your sleepy swollen face looks so nice…then you wash your face and the reality hits. Dark circles that won’t go away no matter what manhoos eye cream you use.
29. If you’re a girl say hello random chin hair
You grow hair in the most random places…like under your chin. Matlab…kya bakwaas hai yaar?
30. Best (or worst?) of all, you’re still clueless about many things in life
10 years ago you might have looked up to people who were in their 30’s and thought, wow! they have their life figured out. Nope. Truth is that no one has their shit together at any age. We’re all pretty clueless.
Abay yaarrr #Dhoka
There you have it, people. Have you had any similar epiphanies after turning 30? Which one of these do you identify with? Let us know in the comments below.