An intense breakup can be very hard
Not all good things last. Most breakups leave you emotionally wounded and drained. You become dysfunctional and it feels as if nothing will ever be right again. But hey, you’re not alone. This feeling of being ripped apart from the inside will go away. You do move on, no matter how attached you were to someone, it does get better. So stay strong and don’t give up on yourself.
Here are the stages everyone goes through after breaking up with their significant other:
1. You’re in denial at first about the intense breakup
This is the stage where you just don’t feel anything at all. Basically, by subconsciously using this method, you’re protecting your mind from dealing with the end of the relationship. Sometimes you don’t even think much about the whole thing and you don’t feel anything at all. But this stage never lasts long.
2. Then it hits you… hard
This is the scariest part of the whole process. It finally hits you that the person you thought you were going to spend your whole life with, is no longer your person. The person whose every single move you were aware of, disappeared just like that. You can’t even ask them how they are. You can’t even talk to them.
You cry, you scream, you feel the worst sort of heartache there can ever be. You realize that a heart can actually physically feel pain. You wonder why there’s no painkiller for this kind of pain.
3. And then you begin to replay the relationship in your mind
Even if your friends and family assure you that things ended for the best, and you weren’t even right for each other, you still can’t help but look back and find anything bad about your relationship. You force yourself into believing everything was so perfect and now it’s gone.
4. You start having questions about the future
Will you ever be loved bu someone else the way you loved them? Will you ever find someone else? What will happen now?
5. Then you suddenly want to fix everything and get back to where it was before the intense breakup
Even if you have to beg, you just want them back. You just want this awful pain and emptiness in your heart to go away, for which you’re ready to do anything. You think of texting them, calling them and sometimes you do, but deep inside you kind of know, that this time it’s actually over, you just don’t want to accept it.
6. But then you turn on your stalker mode
You start stalking them on social media, looking at pictures of you two together. Any chance you get to see some activity from them gives you insane amount of satisfaction.
7. You might even experience withdrawal symptoms
Like a drug addict would feel the unpleasant physical reaction that accompanies the process of ceasing to take an addictive drug, you feel withdrawal of your beloved. You don’t enjoy doing anything. Nothing a friend does or says helps you feel better.
You can’t sleep, you either eat too much or stop eating altogether. There’s a huge hole in the life you knew for so long, a big chunk of your routine is missing and you just crave for it to be back.
8. Aaand then the sad song time
Even plain water reminds you of them. Every song, every little thing that happens in the world, you somehow manage to connect it to them. You torture yourself by listening to sad songs, and your friends get sick of hearing you talk about them non-stop.
9. But soon after, the pain starts becoming less severe
You start going back to your normal life, the life you lived before your significant other walked in. It’s hard but you try. You still haven’t completely gotten over them yet but you start to see yourself becoming a person, again.
10. But then extreme anger hits
Mood swings are natural, it’s intense heartbreak, after all.
You start hating them so much. You start hating their guts, the way they dressed, the way they talked the way the inhaled and exhaled oxygen. You hate sappy and chummy couples, you despise valentine’s day. You hate every single thing about the world. You never want to be with anyone else, ever again.
11. But reality has a way of jolting you back from your intense breakup
This is a really good stage. You have accepted that this end was final and they are never coming back. Instead of swinging between two extremes of finding perfection in them or thinking they were the worst kind of monster ever to have lived, you accept their strengths and flaws.
You realize that you both shared good memories and you start understanding why breaking up with them was a good thing.
12. You finally open yourself for another chance at love
You have finally moved on and you no longer cringe at the idea of love.
13. And you learn to start loving yourself again after that intense breakup
Go out there, let your heart fall for someone else. It deserves to be loved back.
Cover image via: pacarhot.blogspot.com