Everyone knows what a cordial, supportive and nurturing relationship Imran shares with his ex-wife Jemima. After all they share two children; Qasim, and Suleiman, people expect them to be courteous and friendly for the sake of the family. And the two have kept a very civil relationship with one another, with Jemima tweeting about Imran and their time as a married couple quite frequently.
People exalt the relationship of Imran Khan and Jemima for the “love” that they supposedly still have for each other.
And because of this, people love Jemima and her Twitter is usually inundated with loving messages from Pakistanis, asking her to reconcile with Imran Khan or just praising how courteous she is with her ex-husband.
When she tweeted congratulations to Imran Khan for being elected as the Prime Minister, people just went insane in applauding her and calling her a ‘great woman’.
There were so many people wishing her well and expressing their wishes of reconciliation to her. People were impressed that an ex-wife could be so courteous and wish her ex-husband well.
We have seen the amount of love that people have for Imran’s first wife and how they absolutely adore the cordial ties between them because the precedent in this society is completely the opposite. Usually, divorces are bitter, once the papers have been signed, the exes never see each other again.
The idea of maintaining friendly or even cordial ties with an ex-spouse is unheard of, even if the custody of children is shared
Maintaining a good relationship after a divorce is considered somewhat of a Western concept. People cannot stomach the fact that two people can be civil to each other even after separating; I think the confusion arises because in our society divorce is frowned upon and is the last resort. Usually exercised by people who are in abusive relationships, and to society, if that was the case then why would one want to have anything to do with their ex.
So when people see Bushra Maneka and her ex-husband not at each other’s throats, they appear to be unable to understand the concept of courteous exes
If they have such a good relationship why would they have divorced? Unless Bushra left him for Imran Khan in which case Khawar should be embarrassed that his wife would ever do such a thing and it should have bruised his ego.
But Khawar Maneka is not like that, he shares a relationship of respect and courtesy with his ex-wife. And in the spirit of that respect and courtesy, Khawar Maneka made a statement to the press expressing how he wished Imran Khan luck for his term as Prime Minister and expressed how he believed in Imran’s abilities.
Instead of being appreciated for being such a respectful and kind person that he is so positive about his ex-wife’s new relationship and has maintained such a courteous relationship with her even after their divorce, people were incredibly critical and downright rude.
Are people attacking Bushra’s ex because he is a man and thus “beghairat” for having left his wife and then still being courteous to her as some sort of blemish on his mardaangi?
,beygharti k b koi had hoti ha pr khawar manka ka number is sey b uper ha
— Ameer Hamza (@AmeerHamza6331) July 30, 2018
Why is that a woman who is able to be happy for her ex-husband is appreciated but a man is called beyghairat for the same thing? Where and how does ghairat come into play here?
The double standards and hypocrisy aren’t lost in this situation. The same behavior which Jemima is appreciated for is being called immoral in a man. Why? Because apparently, Khawar Maneka’s manliness is dependent on how enraged he is about his ex-wife’s new relationship.
His support and courtesy is being taken as shamelessness but honestly where is the shame in being a supportive ex-husband when your divorce was amicable? Especially when the reaction for a woman who does the same is extremely different.
Khawar and Bushra Maneka share a long history as well as five children with each other, so having an amicable break-up is actually a good thing and expected considering what they share with one another. So instead of calling Khawar Maneka shameless for being a supportive ex-husband, maybe we should applaud him for being such a big person.
Instead of demonizing having a cordial relationship with your ex-spouse, we should accept and appreciate it
Unless the marriage was abusive and the parties cannot see one another without reliving their trauma, there is no reason to be bitter about one another.
Just because a couple divorced does not mean they should be nasty to one another and should only harbor feelings of resentment towards each other. That does no one any good and does more damage to the people involved in the long run.