If you haven’t even heard of ‘Friends’ really what have you been doing with your life?
I mean, wow!
Anywho, so we always talk of ‘If falan falan show would be remade into a Pakistani show tou kaisa ho?’ but if we think about making Friends, Pakistani, well oh no no, that ain’t possible, and here’s why:
Guys and Gurlzz living together.
La Hawla Wala Quwwat. In this country, even walking down the street with a girl is all sorts of haraam. So really, realistically this isn’t even possible. Unless everyone gets married to each other, but that just ruins everything, and basically turns it into every other Hum TV drama. Oh, and they’ll need to even add some always-suspicious saas-es in there too, just for dramatic effect.
They’re friends with Rachel who is… a waitress
For some reasons all our dramas show the most exquisite lifestyles ever, and even if they don’t, the woman is never a waitress. LIKE NEVER. I don’t know, I mean the job gives you so much power: ‘Don’t get the waiter angry, otherwise they’ll spit in your food!’
Monica is a woman who works professionally as a chef?
Larkiyon ka kaam hai kitchen mein ja kar khana pakana. By this logic, Monica should be great in the kitchen but oh wait, SHE ISN’T. And we can’t possibly show that on the screen, and its not like she has a kaamwali to help her out and all. Uff ye Friends bhi na!
Ross has a wife who is a… Lesbian
We don’t talk about *that* stuff on our televisions. Tauba Tauba. You’ll probably need to take a shower just to clean yourself after reading that word *shudders*.
Phoebe gives birth to her brother’s children
Brother-sister bond is great and all but, uhhh, calm it down, you guys.
Joey doesn’t share food.
Sorry to break it to you Joey, but here in Pakistan, you gotta share your food. ALWAYS. And if you’re still unwilling to do so, people will still steal right from your plate. You can’t even put up a fuss about it, because manners and ‘beta log kya kahein ge?’
Emma exists because two unmarried people did something very naughty
Yeah, that’s a part of the story we would need to COMPLETELY cut out!
Joey works full time as a “struggling” actor
‘Kaafi auditions hogaye beta, just become a doctor!’
Rachel and Ross keep getting together and breaking up without… shaadi
Are they getting married? Are they over? Oh they’re back again? Haye ye kya ho raha hai! We as a qoum need to know know EVERYTHING about a relationship, what’s happening, who said what and why, LIKE SAB KUCH! So basically considering how unreliable and shaky this relationship is, all it would give desi aunties is anxiety.
The kids don’t like their parents all that much
Where the walidein at yo? Like bara kiya, paal bhos ke, aur no mention, nope we cannot teach our new generation such things.
Phoebe as an akeli larki sings in restaurants
Aik tou she sings, and then she does in public, in front of na-mehrams! *faints* So much wrong with this!
Monica and Chandler married but didn’t produce babies the next month
Like shaadi hogayi, hurry along and give birth. But noooo, we must wait! Ugh!
So as you can see, there are serious issues with remaking ‘Friends’ as a Pakistani Drama. So let’s never talk about it and keep the show as it is, PERFECT.
But Janice, as the phupho ki beti would work perfectly
Actually come to think of it, Janice would make the perfect khala/phupho ki beti who wants to get married to you. She’s perfectly annoying and everyone hates her. Okay so that’s it, we’re keeping Janice.
Do you want to see a Pakistani remake of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.? Who would be your dream cast? Let us know.
Cover Photo Via: Warner Bros. Television