Shaadis have become an integral part of our beings. If we’re not invited to at least 4, during the season, we feel like the worst kinds of social outcasts there are. And every shaadi out there has a set quota of particular girls, and they’re always present.
So here are some of the lovely ladies we encounter at shaadis, everywhere:
1. The gossip queen
The one who knows everything about Rashid Uncle’s son’s adventures in Bali, and what Kausar Auntie’s daughter did at the mehndi.
2. The one who’s there for the food
She’ll have her eye on every single waiter, watching every single move they make to know exactly when the roti khullos.
3. The selfie-queen
You’ll see her in every corner of the hall/marquee, finding the perfect light for her selfies. Udher rukhsati bhi khatam ho jati hai lekin in ki selfies nahi.
4. The Snapchatter
She’s probably best friends with the selfie-queen, but she takes it one step further. You’ll see the dulha-dulhan with the dog filter, too. And probably the dulhan’s dada isn’t spared, either.
5. The one who doesn’t want to be there
She’ll not have put in any effort in what she’s wearing. Last night’s kajal and a perpetual annoyed face. She’ll also probably be complaining a lot about the whole ‘institute of marriage’ but the truth is, she realllyy didn’t like getting dressed for the shaadi.
6. The competitor
Joota chhupai, doodh pilai she won’t leave a single excuse to put down the larki/larka walas and she’ll try getting as much money from the dulha as possible. She might just switch sides if hers is losing.
7. The dulhan-ki-saheli
She’ll be there for her BFF every step of the way. From carrying tissue papers to fixing her make up every five minutes to making sure her lehnga looks picture perfect, throughout the night.
8. The one who makes everything awkward
Asking inappropriate questions from the dulha-dulhan is her forte. She won’t care if she’s on the stage, or if the dulha’s taaya is nearby, she’ll ask her inappropro questions.
9. The constant make-up fixer
She’ll have her lipstick and mirror in her bag at all times, and she’ll constantly be fixing hers after every breath. Drink water. Lipstick. Eat a bite. Lipstick. Meet Khalida Auntie. Lipstick.
10. The one who isn’t happy with anything
The lights aren’t right. The biryani should have had more chicken. It’s too hot. It’s too cold. The dulha shouldn’t have shaved. And nothing will hold her back from voicing her opinion.
You’re always sitting there. Comfortably close to the all the action, but you also have your phone fully charged for entertainment. You’re moderately close to the family but distant enough to not be dragged into the whole jhamela. You’re happy.
Cover image via: ARY Films