When you see shaadis in movies and shows, everything seems to fall together in place. Ceremonies are smooth and weepy. Sab ke clothes are on point. However, it’s different when your best friend gets married. You’re actively a part of the ceremonies, which gives you a front row seat to any drama that may take place. However, you also experience a range of emotions, because, well – that’s your best friend. Since one of my best friends recently got married, I got to experience everything first hand.

Here’s a bunch of stuff that you go through:

Firstly, you still try to fathom the idea that your best friend is getting married

You don’t understand. You keep thinking abhi toh itna time hai. You probably have reservations, too, about whether or not he or she is ready.

The transition from friend to wife/husband is insane – one you take time getting used to

You can’t wrap your head around the fact that your friend is about to become someone else’s life partner. They have that extra title added to their life now. Yeh kab hua?

You have to start getting used to the new individual in the picture 

Your best friend’s husband/wife is new to the picture. Obviously, this takes a little getting used to. They have years of catching up to do. And slowly, you start becoming the third wheel.

Somewhere, deep down, you feel like you’re going to be replaced

Can’t marry your best friend, can you? You can’t help but feel like their significant other will end up replacing you.

You have these mini turf wars with the groom

It’s not exactly an issue or even something that’s obvious. It’s just something that happens because a lot of the things that you’re used to doing – someone else already has those covered.

You pass these off as banter, but deep down, you’re kind of guns out about the whole situation

You laugh it off and make jokes about it, but deep down you’re just like bro yeh kya baat hui?

You’re super excited about all the preparations

It’s a pretty big deal. Your best friend is basically tying the knot. You can’t help but be excited.

But you’re also dreading the bridezilla attacks from your friend

If your best friend’s a girl – especially a girl who strives for perfection – you know what’s coming next. You’re expecting the rants, the breakdowns and the screaming. You’re not looking forward to it, but you’re also sort of prepared.

Ek trip down memory lane toh banti hai

Prior to the big day, you’ve got the tissues ready and you’re ready to reminisce your journey. Not that either of you is dying. But like, it’s just something people do. The whole ‘my baby’s all grown up’ trope and what not.

You’ll probably be just as nervous when the big day arrives as the dulha and dulhan themselves

It isn’t just a big day for your best friend. It’s a big day for you, too. You keep hoping that everything sails smoothly. Every Bollywood movie ever will have you believe otherwise.

When you see your best friend all tayyar on the day itself, you can’t help but tear up a little

They’re there – looking all beautiful and ethereal and you can’t help but feel kinda mom-ish. You have a bachay bare hogaye moment.

That moment when the nikkah papers are signed? Yeah, pretty anti-climatic, but kind of emotional too

When my best friend got married, she had to remind the waqeel that she’s supposed to say qubool hai thrice. It wasn’t exactly a huge moment. It was over pretty soon. But it was pretty emotional.

When it’s all over, you look back at her in disbelief. Like, ho gaya

Like – it’s done. It’s over. Paper sign hogaye. Shaadi hogayi. Without any maslas. This realization is one that keeps hitting you from time to time.

You realize that you’re officially the unmarried third wheel

Now that your best friend is out of the way, you’re in the spotlight. You’re unmarried and you’re the perpetual third wheel. You’re officially the center of attention, bombarded with the same question: aap ki shaadi kab ho rahi hai?

Attending your best friend’s wedding – being a part of all the celebrations – is honestly a really emotional, but memorable experience. You deal with the rishta aunties it sends your way, of course. And you think back to all the drama and laugh. Because at the end of it all, it’s worth it for your best friend’s happiness.

Cover images via @sajalaly/Instagram