We thought that making a list about 13 things that were banned in Pakistan would have to do but, boy were we wrong? There have been so many more things that have been banned in Pakistan ever since but you still found a way to do them.
So here goes, without any particular order, here are some things that are ‘banned’ in Pakistan, or declared illegal, but everyone just finds a way to them:
Careem/Uber
As of this morning, the Government of Punjab, followed by the Government of Sindh , banned private ride-hailing apps in their respective provinces. Buuuuut with the app still working, we came to work on Uber, today. *Waqar Zaka-style-living-on-the-edge-gesture*
Aamir Liaquat
Welllll, he’s still on TV even after he got officially banned by PEMRA. While PEMRA also issued a notice saying they would take away the news channel’s license if they still went ahead with their show with Aamir Liaquat, Aamir Bhai clearly told them ‘dekho aise nai chale ga’ and we went ahead with the show.
Drugs
It’s no secret that drugs are banned in Pakistan, and it is also no secret that they’re probably one of the most commonly available source of entertainment in the country. And if you don’t believe me. Ye dekh lo
Prostitution
Well, it’s a horrid horrid practice, but one that still lurks in the streets of the country, when men, women, and even children are forced to sell their bodies to feed their stomachs.
Torrents-DVDs-Piracy
Piracy tau banned hai hi hai, but after the ban on Indian films and content, we saw every single person partaking in the illegalities. YouTube and other streaming websites became everyone’s best friend when Susraal Simar Ka was on.
Gambling
Deep in the gullies of shady muhallas, there’s gambling hubs that put Las Vegas to shame as every weekend, millions are won and lost.
Double savaari
Ye tau bhool hi jayein na. Har jagah, har waqt.
Texting while driving
Not only is it illegal, it’s a security hazard, too. But do we stop?
Extra-marital affairs
Behooda. But abundant, unfortunately.
Rishwat
In the words of the great Malik Riaz, ‘file ko pahiye (wheels) nai lugte tau file chalti nai hai’
The 10 pm wedding ban in Punjab and Khyber Pakhtunkhwa
We have our way around things, and we have our way around the 10 pm wedding ban, as well. Farm houses, indoor shaadis, paise lugao toh sub chalta hai. To the point that even if the dulha’s dad is arrested, they carry on.
Smuggling
We smuggle everything. From drugs, to alcohol, to movies, to organs, to whole people.
Taking a piss in public
While we’re always taking a piss all the time, but this is special. Everywhere it says it’s banned to piss, we make sure to piss.
Bijli/gas churana
Kunda daalna is a very common sight in Pakistan. But as long as humaari bijli bach jaye, iz cool iz cool.
Paisa churana bhi banned hai
Lekin woh tau ooper sey le ker neeche tak sub kerte hain
Sheesha
While sheesha is banned in public places, everyone who used to smoke it outdoors now smokes in indoors.
Wall-chalking
And we don’t just stop at wall-chalking, we cover wall-chalking with more wall-chalking and wherever it’s not allowed, it’s graffiti-ed on the walls, themselves. Also, how much fun is it to say wall-chalking?
Dhuaan wali savaari
They were banned quite a few years ago but cars, motorcycles, rickshaws, buses, trucks, we see them all emitting beautiful black smoke and enriching our lungs.
Eating khotey ka gosht
Okay, I admit we didn’t know we were eating it, but it still makes its way to the list, in any case.
Cutting down trees
Uh oh. Last year, more than 2200 trees were cut down, without replacement, to widen roads.
Workplace harassment
But…khulley aam.
Ishara torna
Tehelna, taarna, aur ishara torna Pakistan ka Qoumi triathalon hona chahiye.
Loving without a nikaah-nama to make it “halal”
Larka larki Nikkah naama ke bagheyr kahin ja nahi saktey. 2 larkay pyaar nahi ker saktey. 2 larkiyan pyaar nahi ker saktein. Pyaar tau kahin raha hi nahi hai. Lekin kerte sub hain, batata koi nahi
What else do you know that’s banned but you find your way to it?