As A Pregnant Woman, Here Are 13 Of The Most Annoying And Illogical Pieces Of Advice I Received

By Sannia Bilal | 18 Nov, 2018

Being pregnant is a blessing. But it sure as hell comes with a baggage of muft ki advice pouring in from every end once you break the news to the masses. Whatever the circumstances may be, the infamous desi way of handling things is always rather intriguing. If nothing else, logon ki mentality hee samajh aajati hai. 

Anyway, here are 13 of the most annoying things I got to hear:

 

1. Never exercise, it can harm the baby. 

Exercise?! Tauba! Doctors tou aesey hi kehtay rehtay hein!

I’m already gaining weight, yaar. Let me at least exercise in peace. Especially when I’ve consulted a professional.

Source: Imagekit.io

 

2. DO NOT wear heels! 

The reason is still unknown to mankind. Will I trip any more than I usually do? Will women forget to walk due to pregnancy brain? Why is wearing heels such a huge deal?

Via Giphy

 

3. C-Section?! They’ll stitch your organs together.

Um…I think the doctors know what they’re doing. And…that’s not how medicine works? You don’t just start stitching organs together without noticing…

Source: Dharma Productions

 

4. Try looking at beautiful people frequently. You’ll have a baby who’s just as beautiful.

Matlab ke, kuch bhi?! Mujhe iski science koi samjha de please.

Source: K9 Productions

 

5. Dont step out during a lunar eclipse! Bachay par bura asar paray ga!

With that kinda talk, I feel like such people should be kept away from children everywhere to prevent any kind of bura asar. 

Via Tumblr

 

6. Don’t eat chocolates! Even try to avoid iron supplements. Bacha kaala paida hoga

Illogical statement aside, what’s wrong with dark-skinned children? Why is gorapan everything for most people?

Source: SLB Films

 

7. Labor is so much worse than you can imagine.

*Graphic account of own experience*

Thanks, like I wasn’t shitting bricks already.

Source: Dharma Productions

 

8. Hide your belly with your dupatta!

Ah yes. The moral police. Constantly glaring at bellies. Always choosing to lecture instead of averting their gazes.

Source: Jhoom Jhoom Productions

 

9. Don’t attend funerals while you’re pregnant.

You want me…to not mourn a dead family member? Just because I’m pregnant? Honestly, who comes up with this stuff?

Source: Dharma Productions

 

10. Don’t tell anyone about your pregnancy

Yeah, you’re right. They won’t find out through my swollen belly. Genius advise, yaar. 10/10.

iqra-suno-gif
Source: Hum Network Limited

 

11. Drink desi ghee so the baby can slip out easily

I appreciate your idea of natural lubrication. But um, I doubt that’s going to work.

Source: UK Film Council

 

12. Don’t push too hard while using the loo, bacha bahar na nikal aye

Hmm… So what takes hours in the labor room will happen in a span of 10-20 minutes while I use the bathroom? Cool, cool. I’m totally not confused by how you think.

Via: Giphy

 

13. Eat almonds and drink milk if you want a fair baby

Honestly, how do you even argue with something like this?

Source: MD Productions

Despite all the things you’ll have to bear during pregnancy, having all aunties throw unwanted advice your way might seem to be the worst. But hey, we wish you the best of luck! Have anything to add? Let us know in the comments.

 

We Asked Pakistani Women The Weirdest Things People Said When They Were Pregnant And They Did Not Disappoint

 

This Young Doctor In Karachi Saw Child Birth For The First Time And He’s Written A Love Letter To Pregnant Women After The Experience

 

 


Cover Image Via: Lakesideob.com

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