With the recent shifts in fault lines in the Hindu Kush, Afghanistan, Pakistan, India and Nepal have been on the receiving end of many earthquakes in recent history, the aftershocks and tremors jolting the region more often than we’d like. However, Pakistani fundo reasoning defies all logic as female show of skin is blamed for seismic shifts, among other vices.
Here’s a quick little list:
1. This Pakistani Plato.
Stop everything! just think for one mint why earth tremors coming again and again in Pakistan. #Earthquake
— Omair Shafiq (@OmairFever) January 8, 2016
2. This nifty nomad.
#earthquake are too frequently hitting Pakistan. Frequent earthquakes are an indication of Almighty's anger Repent before His wrath descends
— Nomad (@The__Ascension) January 12, 2016
3. This depressed thug.
@HaniiSays Lanat ha tumhare kartut pe tumhe ap ne smile ke pure ha
— Hafsa (@GirlHypnotic) January 12, 2016
4. This foretelling fortune-teller.
Pakistan has repeatedly been told- wake up before you are woken up. Repent or await another wake-up call. Mark my words! #earthquake
— Muhammad Umair (@Muhammad929292) January 8, 2016
5. This conspiracy theorist.
— Armaan Malik (@Armaaaan24) January 8, 2016
6. This good muslim.
Yaha Astagfirullah karne ki bjae agr waqai taubah kar lo, achay kaam karo, Allah ki ibadat karo tou shyd zalzalay kam ho jaein. 🙂
— سخواه نویر (@sakhwa) January 12, 2016
7. This transphobe.
So this is happening for real. Awain to zalzalay nai aate :)) pic.twitter.com/8Uy2Yc1Z0v
— Ali Zain Raza (@azr960) January 12, 2016
8. These crappy attempts at city wars.
@proudwarri0r if that is so, then islamabad walon apny Amaal theek kro zalzalay nhi ayenge.. Just saying.
— Hafsah (@HafsahjaweD) January 12, 2016
9. This sarcastic comment.
Horny awam ki waja say hi whatsapp ko mout aai hui hay aur zalzalay bhi aa rahy hain.
— Rida Khan (@RiidZK) January 2, 2016
10. This startling realization.
Your stupidity is causing earthquakes you fucking imbeciles.
— Shumail (@Shumyl) June 29, 2015
11. This subtle mention of Altaf Bhai.
anyone know who protect karachi from earthquakes? i'd like to thank him, there must be one. since we have a guy who saves us from storms.
— saad. (@chimgadar) October 26, 2015
12. This epic show of sass.
Pfft!obviously earthquakes happen because girls go beyparda and attract unwanted attention, cover up bitches!
— Atiya Abbas (@AtiyaAbbas) April 16, 2013
13. This coining of the term ‘azaabi earthquakes’.
Took no time for people to start issuing their version of why Allah is punishing us with azaabi earthquakes. Sigh.
— Imaan Sheikh (@SheikhImaan) October 26, 2015
14. This call to action.
If you people didn't watch so much porn there wouldn't be earthquakes
— Zarrar Khuhro (@ZarrarKhuhro) September 24, 2013
15. This paramount plea.
Why couldn't they come up with something more scientific? The fissures caused by people having unprotected haraam sex led to the earthquake?
— Zuhayr (@BipolarBhaijaan) June 29, 2015
16. This refreshing bit of comic relief.
RT @geoteztv: NAUJAWAN LARKIYAN FAHASH KAPRON MAIN PHIRAINGE TO AISA HE HOGA NA: MAULANA DIESEL KA ZALZALAY PAY BAIYAAN.
— Buffetkhor (@MyDixonCider) March 20, 2014
17. This hit and miss.
'baghairti support karte hein zalzalay jese azab naa aaye tou aur kya ho #lovewins' lmao azaab missed its target by a few thousand miles
— Faizan. (@merabichrayaar) June 29, 2015
18. This poor soul who wanted to re-sell tickets
But got a free lesson on morality, instead…