Zubaida aapa, famous television cook and totka queen, is widely beloved. She has been gracing television screens in Pakistan for a while now and has provided many versions of chicken karahi to desis living everywhere in the world. The lady, who many look up to as a loving grandma, is personally not so active on social media, understandably. However, this Twitter account dedicated to everything and anything Zubaida aapa might have to say about our world is absolutely hilarious.
The fake Zubaida aapa has funny, often sarcastic, responses to many things, so here’s all the times this account made us LOL:
1. That time when aapa had a totka for anyone who’s obsessed with beauty
Ham kam Khoobsurat logon se nafrat aisay kartay hain jaisay har insan apnay aap ko Order par banwata hai
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) November 9, 2015
2. And then she shared a totka to deal with cockroaches in your home
Agar aap ke ghar Cockroach aye tou aap bhi us ke ghar jayein takay un ko pata chalay kisi ke ghar is tarah jana kitna ghalat hai
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) October 27, 2015
3. When she shared one of the most useful totkas ever
Beta neem garam pani mai Elfy mila kar piyo tou Loose Motions ruk jayengay pic.twitter.com/B0nY0s3enn
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) April 19, 2016
Also see: We Tried Some Of Zubaida Aapa’s Totkay And Here’s What Happened
4. Aapa was sad about General Sharif’s retirement as the Army Chief
Agar Army ko siyasatdaan head kartay tou us ka faida ye hota ke COAS ka Beta agla COAS hota aur confusion na hoti
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) November 20, 2016
5. And then she made the most impressive prediction that has already come true once
Meri ye baat likh lo ke #PSL har saal Pakistan jeetega
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) February 23, 2016
6. That time when she reacted to the American elections
Aur unho ne aaj sabit bhi kar diya pic.twitter.com/cThUi31vqO
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) November 9, 2016
Also see: This Is How Pakistanis Are Welcoming The New US President
7. When she took on load shedding with a brave smile
Jee beta kafi behtar hai pehlay 8 ghantay aur ab alhamdulillah 14 ghantay horahi hai https://t.co/RnRnifoGz5
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) November 10, 2016
8. And that time when she wished people on Diwali
Agar Popalzai Pandit hotay tou Diwali bhi aik din pehlay manatay#happyDiwali
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) October 29, 2016
9. And that moment she was contemplating a career change
Jis umr ki Airhostesses PIA mai kaam karti hain soch rahi hoon mai bhi apni CV dedoun
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) October 16, 2016
10. Aapa jee also had some opinions on those Snapchat obsessed people who don’t follow her totkay
Itnay Filters ke baad bhi agar aap Kaalay hain tou aap ki zindagi par Laanat hai
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) September 16, 2016
11. And then she became obsessed with getting an iPhone 7
Is baar Qurbani ki khaalai'n mujhey dedain mai ne iPhone 7 khareedna hai#AppleEvent
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) September 7, 2016
12. When she wasn’t very impressed with the latest season of Coke Studio
Mai Laanat bhejti houn aisay Coke Studio par ke jis mai Mehwish Hayat tou gaa sakti hai lekin Altaf Hussain nahi
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) August 13, 2016
13. Aapa also has opinions on how Pakistani television industry landscape looks like
PTV ke mutabiq Pakistan itna mazboot hai ke agla American President Pakistan ke marzi se banega
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) June 24, 2016
14. She could not help but pay her condolences over Brexit
England ke is waqt jitnay buray halaat hain hamaray darwazay British Mahajireen ke liye hamesha khulay rahengay#WelcomeToPakistan
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) June 27, 2016
15. And that time she said what your grandmother would’ve about your bad sleeping habits
Sahir Lodhi jitna bhi Chichora, Maila aur Zeher hai, subah uthta jaldi hai
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) May 16, 2016
16. When aapa could see Pakistan becoming more inclusive
Shukar hai ab ham liberal ban rahay hain pic.twitter.com/sIrdt8X0Uu
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) December 18, 2015
17. And when she was not in the mood to make ANY jokes
Khud sari raat jagtay ho lekin tumharay Zameer ko neend bohot ati hai
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) January 29, 2016
She has also shown special interest in famous celebrities:
18. So she went after Hamza Ali Abbasi
حمزہ علی عباسی کی شرعی حالت میں ایک یادگار تصویر ۔ pic.twitter.com/KJqKVrFlqn
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) September 13, 2015
19. And Adnan Sami
Adnan Sami ko tum hi rakh lo ham dusra phula lengay
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) January 3, 2016
20. She did not spare President Mamnoon Hussain, either
Mai President ban kar pooray Pakistan ko mannequin challenge deraha houn. – Mamnoon Hussain
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) November 18, 2016
Also see: President Papa
21. And for anyone aspiring to be on TV, aapa has a suggestion for you too
Agar aap TV band kar ke us ke samnay sara din bethay rahein tou aap sara din TV pe ayengay
— Zubeda Aapa (@AapaZubeda) August 31, 2015
Zubaida aapa kee jai 😛
Cover image via: HUM Masala